I Was the Bottleneck. I Just Didn’t See It.

How Good Intentions Slowed My Team Down and What  I Changed

Read Time: 5 minutes

A few years ago, I was leading a high-stakes implementation.
Tight timeline. Big client. Lots of moving parts.

Every task flowed through me. Every update, approval, and final check.
I thought I was being thorough. I thought I was protecting the project.
But in reality?

I was the bottleneck.
And I didn’t realize it until the team stopped moving.

When ‘Helpful’ Becomes Harmful

As project managers, we take pride in being actively involved.
We want to make sure things don’t slip. We want to stay close to the work.
But sometimes that urge turns into a quiet form of control.

Here’s what it looked like for me:

• Insisting on reviewing every deliverable

• Asking to be cc’d on every thread

• Delaying approvals while I “double-checked” everything

• Holding onto responsibilities I should’ve delegated

I wasn’t micromanaging maliciously.
I just didn’t trust the silence. I needed constant visibility to feel in control.

💬 A PM in our community shared that she used to review every deliverable before anything moved forward. At first, her team appreciated the support. But over time, timelines slipped and updates stalled. When she stepped back and empowered her leads to own decisions, the project picked up speed and team morale improved almost immediately.

The Moment It Hit Me

One of my team members finally said, “I can’t move forward until you respond.”

I had become the blocker—the one thing preventing progress.

And worse: they knew I was the blocker, but no one wanted to say it out loud.
That’s when I realized this wasn’t just a workflow issue.
It was a leadership issue.

What I Changed

Here’s how I rebuilt momentum without disappearing as a leader:

✅ Delegated final reviews
I picked one trusted lead per stream and gave them autonomy to move forward without waiting for my sign-off.

✅ Set ‘approval thresholds’
We defined when I truly needed to be involved (e.g., significant scope changes) and when I didn’t.

✅ Empowered my team to call me out
I told them directly, “If I become the blocker again, say so. I’ll step back.”

✅ Built a self-check habit
Each Friday, I now ask myself: “Am I the reason something isn’t moving?”

That one question has saved more momentum than any software tool ever could.

The Lesson

Project managers are often the glue.
But glue in the wrong places? It gums up the engine.

If you’re catching every ball, jumping into every thread, or sitting on approvals, check in with yourself.
What feels like leadership might be fear in disguise.

And that’s how fundamental awareness is built between the milestones.

👇 Your Turn

Have you had to lead when someone above you was unclear or missing?

👉 Share your story in the comments below or respond to this email.

You might be featured in an upcoming spotlight!